Posts : 10
Join date : 2018-03-05
Age : 41
Location : North Carolina
|Subject: Finding Me Tue Mar 27, 2018 11:15 pm|| |
ok I have a issue that I am trying to work on ....I have been trying to work on this issue by myself for many years with out getting anywhere so I had it suggested to me that maybe I should turn to family for help so hear I am.....
I have been through so much in my 39 years due to things that have happened to me that were beyond my controle ..I have delt with a lot of hurt as I am sure many of you have and have made some pretty messed up choices in my life.... during all this I seem to have lost track of who the real me is due to hiding behind what I thought everyone wanted to be or just hiding behind a mask because it was easier than dealing with the pain....the pain of things done to me .....the pain of choices I have made and the pain that I have caused people due to the choices I have made..... so I come to you my family for suggestions on how to go about finding myself because I have no clue where to start .... so my question is this....Where would you guys suggest I would start on getting back on track to me? any help or anything at this point would be much appreciated thank you Angelic
Posts : 1067
Join date : 2012-04-02
Age : 61
Location : Canada.
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Tue Mar 27, 2018 11:23 pm|| |
Well Angelic, first of all you aren't alone here. You aren't the only one to fight battles like that or come from an abusive past. I treated my parents like crap back when I was a teenager and pretty much told them to suck one when they questioned my decision to get into black magic. By the time I realized just how bad of a decision I made, many years had gone by and my mom and dad were both dying. I attempted to reach out to them, to amend my wrongs and I did get to apologize to each of them but didn't get much further than because they passed rather quickly. After that, I felt devastated and like I still didn't do enough to make amends, so I pretty much snapped and was institutionalized for quite some time until I learned I had to start over from scratch and learn from my past on what not to do.
When it comes to hurting others, there isn't a ton you can do.. they'll either forgive you and let bygones be bygones, or they simply won't want you back. My suggestion is to realize the things that you CAN control and repair in your life and those that nobody can control and repair. The past you cannot repair but you can rebuild yourself for the future you want and who you want to be.
Posts : 198
Join date : 2013-01-22
Age : 40
Location : in my room creating diabolical schemes
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Wed Mar 28, 2018 12:14 am|| |
You need to find who and what makes you happy and if others don't like it, those people aren't yours to please! Rebuilding process always starts from the ground up, so start from the bottom and realize that it will take time. It is really a matter of finding happiness and letting the good pieces fall in around you!!
Hope that helps...
Posts : 334
Join date : 2014-10-05
Age : 42
Location : San Juan Capistrano, Ca
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Wed Mar 28, 2018 12:21 am|| |
the scariest thing is rebuilding Angelic!! finding who you are and what makes you special is a real thrill ride and its like eating an addictive snack! you find one thing about you, you'll just keep uncovering and finding more and more! don't ever let people be what they want you to be, sometimes you just have to tell the world off and dance to your own tune!
Posts : 906
Join date : 2012-11-10
Age : 37
Location : Anchorage, Alaska.
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Wed Mar 28, 2018 12:41 am|| |
Keep all the good things that you made along the way sister, throw the rest of it aside. Find people that can help you find your confidence and be the person you always dreamed of being!
Posts : 619
Join date : 2014-12-18
Age : 32
Location : Charlotte, NC
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Wed Mar 28, 2018 9:54 am|| |
Hey niecey Angelic, like your sis said if you can find somebody that can help you with confidence and get you out of your shell that could be the ticket to getting you back to being who you want to be. I wouldn't have a problem helping you with some of those things if you'd want to take a chance at it! Remember though, you are the one who has to keep yourself on your feet.. we can always be your crutch and encourage you!
Let me know what you want to do, no rush on it. I know you aren't used to people being this supportive around you! It isn't such a bad thing to get used to once you start either!
Posts : 1052
Join date : 2012-06-30
Age : 63
Location : Ottawa, Canada
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Wed Mar 28, 2018 10:19 am|| |
I think one of the first steps is to do what you say, which is not to let your past define you or in your case, take you prisoner. Take a moment to reflect and look at what you've got around you, remember those things in your past that you were good at and don't be afraid to recapture them. You'll be scared I'm certain, but you need to get out and reinvent yourself like Wendy said, by starting from the bottom and working your way up. The more you work on reinventing and repairing, the less scared you'll feel and you will slowly but surely regain confidence.
~Love always, Princess Toadstool/Annabelle ~~
- Quote :
- "We write of our past to remind us of where we started; we read in the present to know how far we've come." -Heather Butler 1982-2008
Dice Roller ST
Posts : 561
Join date : 2012-08-12
Age : 61
Location : Ottawa, Canada
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Thu Mar 29, 2018 9:30 am|| |
All I can really think of is to not let the choices of your past define you and instead focus on making good decisions and doing what's right for you in the present. Making up for mistakes is fine with those who forgive you but not worth dwelling on with those who don't.
Posts : 175
Join date : 2013-09-30
Age : 25
Location : Missouri
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Sat Mar 31, 2018 11:11 pm|| |
Hey Angelic, remember to have faith in what you want to do and in yourself while doing it. A positive mindset will get positive results over time. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone hurts somebody but they are there for us to learn from. I have faith in you!
"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity."
|that epic crave|
Posts : 105
Join date : 2016-02-20
Age : 26
Location : Michigan
|Subject: Re: Finding Me Sun Apr 01, 2018 12:31 pm|| |
Just need to realize that we all make mistakes and just about any mistake we can redeem ourselves to others or if all else fails, you can redeem and rebuild yourself. Sorry I don't have more advice, Angelic!
|Subject: Re: Finding Me || |